Speed Dating, Class Updates, and Crying in the Library

So you may be wondering - do they do speed dating at Clark University?

They may, actually. My old roommate mentioned to me that Dodd Hall is doing a speed-dating-type-of-meet-and-greet-event in order to encourage neighbors to meet each other.

Comparable to the Dodd event, my experience with speed dating wasn't actually speed dating. However, my 9am Lab in Social Psychology did engage in a speed date set-up, where we rotated in lines and spoke to our classmates for two minutes at a time in order to decide who would work well together in research project groups. Needless to say, there was plenty of giggling and "what are we supposed to talk about, again?" before things like, the areas of psychology we are interested in, were actually discussed.

I can think of very few ways I'd rather spend a significant chunk of my 9am course, than getting to know my classmates via (almost) speed dating.

Beyond my nearly-speed-dating-experience, classes have remained pleasant! I've officially had two of each of my three courses (Lab in Social Psychology, Women in Society, Women in Jewish Culture) and I was able to meet with Prof. Fox yesterday in order to discuss plans for the independent study/Jewish Studies capstone I'll be working on with him. So far we've begun drafting a reading list, including books by Earl Grollman and Anne Brener. We will also be examining texts from the Bible and Midrash - to start with, likely I'll be examining Psalms and the Book of Job (as a reminder, I will be looking at the dying process as a whole, likely with a focus on how folks cope).

A great thing about my college experience so far is that everything seems to be rather interconnected - integration of topics seems to be key in making things relevant to the individual. In my own life, I maintain interest in learning about gender, sexuality, religion, spirituality, death. It is especially exciting to me when these concepts intersect, and I can combine multiple of my interests. But sometimes these intersections can feel overwhelming. Today, in Women in Society, we were discussing the importance of including examinations of class, race, gender, ethnicity, & society in our discussions. But there are so many things to pay attention to! How do I manage to pay attention to all of these important social structures that shape peoples' experiences and lives? It's nearly overwhelming, all of these significant factors, because it's not just about women, it's also about all of these unique social structures that play an important role in distributing power and privilege. But it's simultaneously wonderful. I have so many different viewpoints from which to examine subjects of significance, and I'm so grateful to be taking classes where aspects are considered and people are aware of their own biases & privileges, and my classmates are open and willing to be a part of discussions.

Earlier today, on the third floor of Goddard Library, I sat in a chair and (dutifully) did my homework. Following which, I opened up The Fault in Our Stars, a novel by John Green. And, somewhere around chapter twenty-one, began to cry uncontrollably, startling a student near me who was working on his laptop. The book is about living and dying with cancer, and other things, like love. Overall, very lovely and wonderful, but quite sad.

Two things about this experience made me happy (although I do apologize to the student I startled):
1. Goddard Library is a wonderful place to read/spend time, and I am mildly upset that I only recently discovered that I love to spend time there (I must make up for three and a half inexplicable years without the library by spending a lot of time there this semester) and
2. that even things seemingly unrelated to course work can have thoughts from my classes applied to them. This may sound a bit common-sense-like, but it always pleases me to realize that I can interpret any type of media and use it to further ponder things that are of significance to me. Like, in this case, death/dying, and coping. And, I suppose, things like love.

And that's all for now! I'm off to read more, or watch 'Six Feet Under', or possibly get started on next week's homework. I hope that everyone has a lovely weekend!

And here's a link to some poetry about cats, because I like both poetry and cats.

Ladies, Jews, and Research Review

Hello! Happy New Year! Merry Christmas! Happy Chanukah!

It's a brand new semester at Clark University. Incidentally, my last semester. Ever. Well, of undergrad.

!!!!!!!!!!

Can you tell that I'm So Excited?

Anyway! The semester has started out smoothly. I moved back into my house (23 Maywood - the 'Wellness House') on Sunday afternoon, and settled in/caught up with friends & housemates. On Tuesday I attended three of my classes, all of which were wonderful. This semester's theme seems to be one of mainly Jews, coping (with death/dying/illness), and ladies. Three of my favorite things by far. As a reminder, these are my courses:

1. Lab in Social Psychology (PSYC 201), which fulfills my lab/research requirement for my psych major
2. Women in Society (PSYC 249), which fulfills my first seminar requirement for my psych major
3. Women and Jewish Culture (SOC 258), which sounds interesting and is taught by a professor I really like
4. An independent study regarding Biblical and midrash passages relating to illness, death, and dying (with Prof. E. Fox), which fulfills the capstone requirement for my Jewish studies concentration

I'm super pumped to spend my final semester thinking about/studying topics that are of interest to me - mainly: women & gender, Jewish culture (and the intersection between gender and religion), and ways in which folks cope with illness, death, & dying. The lab in social psychology will be a nice continuation from my psych capstone last semester (which covered the same topic), in addition to a review of the research process.

Recently one of my friends introduced me to the television show 'Six Feet Under', which is about a family-owned funeral home. I've frequently considered aspects of the death process (illness, dying, or death) to likely be a part of my future career (why? You may ask, which is a great question. And a succinct answer would be: to lend meaning to life and to care for folks when they need it the most), but lately I have been pondering the question of death versus dying; specifically for myself, would I feel more comfortable working with folks while they're in the process of dying, or after they've died?

Last semester I went on a field trip to a funeral home with one of my classes, and found myself overall upset by the sight of a corpse beneath a sheet, with just the toes peeking out. For a while, this made me wonder if death was something I could spend time with in a professional setting while still maintaining comfort.

It's still a difficult topic to ponder, and I haven't yet reached any conclusions, but I do hope that experience (internship, perhaps) would help me to decide what exactly it is that I'd like to do with my life.

Returning to thoughts regarding courses! I'm also anticipating that it'll also be a great semester because I'm working with two of my favorite professors - Prof. Fox and Prof. Tenenbaum - in addition to two new (to me) professors who seem intelligent, approachable, and generally just great. Prof. Curtin is teaching the lab in social psychology, and Prof. Falmagne is teaching 'Women in Society'.

So, overall, should be a pleasant semester!

And now I'm off to do reading. Hooray! Homework.

Finals Week! Two Lists of Four.

Hello! It has been a while, and for that I am apologetic.

Currently I'm working through my final papers/presentations/studying, etc. It's finals week! Undergrad courses finish up on Monday, and my COPACE course ends this Wednesday.

This is my list of things that will be completed by the end of the semester:
(1) final draft needed for my psychology capstone paper regarding prosopasnosia,
(2) a ten-minute presentation + a fifteen-page paper for my COPACE course on Death & Dying, regarding suicide as a choice,
(3) a ten-page take-home final for American Jewish Life regarding choice in American Judaism, and
(4) an in-class final exam for Hebrew Bible.

For ROCU, our final show of the semester occurred (if you'd like to see our past playlists/become a fan of us/boost my confidence a bit, you can 'like' our facebook page here). And tomorrow evening is the last CUFS meeting of the semester (with elections! I will soon be phased out as a co-president).

Last night was the wonderful Clark Bars' a capella concert (featuring groups from SUNY New Paltz, Skidmore (<-- that's where my sister went to school!), and Mt. Holyoke).

Tonight is the play 4.48 Psychosis, and Monday is RHA's Trivia Night (featuring questions from CUFS and the Clark Historical Society).

The semester (and the year! Ahhh!) is winding up, and I leave in ten days.

Ten days, and then I will have one semester remaining at Clark. This is equally terrifying and exciting and wonderful and nerve-racking.

I'm getting pretty pumped for Winter break in Portland, which will soon be followed by excitement for next semester's classes. To recap, the classes I'll be taking next semester are:
(1) JS 299 - Independent Study with Prof. Fox: which fulfills my Capstone requirement for my Jewish Studies concentration,
(2) PSYC 201 - Lab in Social Psychology: which fulfills my lab requirement for my psychology major,
(3) PSYC 249 - Women in Society: which fulfills my first seminar requirement for my psychology major,
(4) SOC 258 - Women in Jewish Culture: which fulfills no requirements but is about both ladies and Jewish culture, two things I love. Additional bonus: it will be taught by Prof. Tenenbaum, with whom I took a course this semester and enjoyed greatly.

So there you have it! I shall depart from the internet now, in hopes of working on some papers for a bit before the play this evening.

I hope finals week is going swimmingly for everyone partaking.

Happy Saturday!

Wait, I have how many hours to write fifteen pages?

Countdown to when my paper should be finished by:
T minus 48 hours.

And, roughly twenty minutes or so.

I've been working hard on my prosopagnosia paper this morning/afternoon, especially upon the realization that I need to have it emailed out to my class by the Friday before my presentation. Wish me luck, internet!

In case anyone is interested, I found a couple neat videos that explain the topic fairly succinctly. And if anyone is wondering if they or a loved one has the condition, here's a test that you can do to find out: http://www.faceblind.org/facetests/index.php

Long Island, Thanksgiving, and Papers

Firstly, let me say, November is almost over! It's nearly December! The semester is almost over!

What's. Happening.

Secondly, Thanksgiving break! Mine was lovely (I hope yours was, too!). I did absolutely no homework, but I was able to spend a lot of time with family, friends, and cats. I took advantage of Casco Bay Lines and I visited Long Island, Maine for the first time. Here's a picture of my friend Dylan and I walking through a field on the island (photo credit goes to my friend Zach)

Thirdly, schoolwork. Currently I'm working hard on two papers/presentations simultaneously. On Monday I am presenting my fifteen-page paper on Prosopagnosia for my Psychology capstone (PSYC 273). And a week from Wednesday I will be presenting my final research paper for my COPACE course (the paper is regarding suicide & death as a "choice").

But the paper-writing doesn't end there! On Thursday I should receive in class the prompts for my American Jewish Life take-home exam. Additionally, I will likely also be the recipient of the circumcision paper I turned in a couple of weeks ago.

So, how shall my Tuesday afternoon be spent, you may wonder? I'm planning to continue working on my papers until work this evening, where I will dutifully sit in the projection booth during a screening of "The Princess and the Frog".

Happy end of November! Happy belated Thanksgiving!

Until next time...

Next Stop on Our Tour of Departed Souls..

Sometimes my life feels overwhelmingly concerned with, well, the not-living. Or at least, involved study with these concepts sometimes makes it difficult to look beyond (ha, what a pun!) the inevitability of death and to slow down, take a deep breath, and remember what is significant, relevant (and alive) in my own life.

This past Wednesday I attended a field trip with my COPACE classmates of The Final Chapter. We went to a funeral home located on Main Street, not too far from Clark. The funeral home was called the Graham, Putnam, and Mahoney Funeral Parlor. At first, it was intriguing. Then, it was intimidating. And finally, upon seeing the shape of a corpse beneath a sheet, noticing the faded pink toes peeking out from where the sheet couldn't quite cover, it was incredibly frightening. Upsetting. The realization of the inevitability of death struck hard, despite my mother's input (as I walked back to my home, exclaiming into the phone through rain (of course it rained while I was visiting a funeral home)) that "bodies are just a vessel".

Right. And though comforted by the sentiment, I came to realize that even if this is so, the body is the image of the person that most represents what we remember. It is striking, and strange, and surprising and unsettling to see a body that is no longer alive.

And then I began to wonder of the morbidity of those who work in a funeral parlor - seeing death so frequently, does it lower their threshold? Do they feel helpless, constantly bombarded by the confirmation, the certainty, of death? They spoke of the topic with such care and compassion, and yet so offhandedly.

The director of the home, Peter, was not hopeless nor helpless in the slightest. In his quirky and somewhat teasing manner, he spoke positively of the importance of making meaning in life; through involvement with social movements, writing, film-making, activism. He said something along the lines of, "you do the best you can today, and if you don't make it tomorrow, then that's that". He expressed disdain towards folks who "spend their days working jobs they can't stand, returning home only to eat ice-cream and popcorn on the couch while they watch television".

It's curious, this pattern emerging, that those who spend their time working with death frequently feel that they are able to contribute so much meaning to life.

Regardless, I started to worry, can I ever be as nonchalant (& still respectful) of death? When I work with death, is my breath going to catch in my throat every time I see a body-no-longer-alive?

Death is a strange concept, but one that is manageable. I remember a discussion in class in which death was compared to any major transition; be it a divorce, a break-up, a relocation, a new job. As a senior I am transitioning. In my social life, larger and less familiar transitions are occurring. As upsetting as they are currently, I know that it's okay. Because transitions, uncomfortable despite, don't last forever.

So: death as a transition. Maybe it becomes more manageable over time. New jobs are always difficult to begin, break-ups are always hard, and forming new friendships can sometimes be equally as stressful as they are fulfilling. Transitions are a significant and necessary part of life, but they do seem to get easier the more practice one has going through a particular one.

I'm not suggesting reincarnation here. But perhaps, the more times I recognize death, the more time spent with the dying, the more fluid the transition will appear. Maybe every instance will be different, but perhaps it won't be such a terrifying thing anymore.

Peter (the director) said that people are afraid of death because they're afraid of the unknown. Maybe it's the familiarity that makes his work able to be done more smoothly, more comfortably, with respect, but without alarm nor terror.

I'm not certain of how my life will be significant yet; which movements I will be involved with, where my passions will take me. But I do know that if I want a fulfilling life, I need to make something of it.

Clark, I must thank you for this. Before coming to college I was somewhat hopeless. Being at Clark opened my eyes to a variety of wonderful things; handing me the ability to connect with other folks, to become involved, to do things, anything, to make meaning in life.

And here, to close out a somewhat heavy entry, is Monty Python presenting you with their meaning of life.

(Or, if you prefer Douglas Adams, 42).

Circumcision, Courses, The Future, & Ms. Frizzle

So last night (during a screening of King Kong for SCRN 231) I finally finished my paper on circumcision for SOC 203 - American Jewish Life. I ended up writing about circumcision in two forms: that as an (American) societal construct, and as a specific Jewish ritual & meaningful custom. There is overlap between the two, which can be seen through certain actions; Jewish involvement in the anti-circumcision movement, for example, would suggest a rejection of both the societal construct and of the implication of circumcision in Jewish identity. Other actions, such as Jewish parents who choose to circumcise their children in the hospital directly following birth, rather than waiting the traditional eight days to follow through with the brit milah ("covenant of circumcision") custom, are indicating participation with the societal norm, without participating with the aspect of circumcision that ties into Jewish identity.

Upon reflection, having written the paper & turned it in, I do wish I could have managed my time better to work more efficiently in searching for statistics that would have backed up my proposed thesis; the argument would have been much stronger had I found numbers indicating Jews' and Americans' involvement in various aspects of the circumcision (and anti-) movements.

Just as another update: since last writing in this blog, I also switched my courses around. I was sitting in American Jewish Life and realized how fond I am of the professor, her teaching style, and the topics on which she chooses to focus. I switched out of the COPACE course on the Bible (it's possible that I've taken plenty of bible courses already. All were enjoyable, but a break from the Bible might be pleasant). I'm now planning to take instead Women and Jewish Culture - SOC 258 with Professor Tenenbaum.

Currently I'm feeling very conflicted; overwhelmed, excited, and nervous. Thanksgiving break is approaching, which means the end of the semester, which means winter break, which means Spring semester, which means... graduation! Last week one of my senior friends remarked to me that he had just put commencement into his calendar. Jeeeeez! It's crazy to think about.

Lately people have been asking me what my plans are for after Clark. Honestly, I'm not sure yet. I know that I am very interested in palliative, hospice, and chaplaincy care. I know that I am passionate about religion, gender and sexuality, mental health, and maintaining comfort during times of physical affliction. I would love to be able to tie all of these things together, but I know that likely I will end up focusing on one area and maintaining the others as points of interest and passion.

The biggest decision for me now is to figure out where I would like to go - Boston? A small city? A far-away country? I'm not sure yet.

Over winter break I hope to examine my options more clearly; places where work experience could occur, or possible places of employment. But for the time being I am lacking in a gut-feeling as to where I belong. And despite the discomfort drawn from feeling somewhat displaced, it's totally okay for now.

This upcoming week will be a bit on the quiet side, which is nice after struggling to complete papers and projects on time for this past week. Having turned in my circumcision paper, I will now begin to focus on my presentation/paper regarding prosopagnosia for my psychology capstone. Additionally I will begin to work more in-depth on my COPACE research project, regarding mainly the issue of choice in relation to death (specifically, suicide). I'm excited to attend a field trip with my Final Chapter class on Wednesday: we're going to a funeral home!

Generally, when people hear the words "field trip" they don't think of funeral homes. At least, my mind always first goes to Ms. Frizzle.

I think I may take a brief field trip to the library right now - relax a bit while reading Tina Fey's Bossypants (I recommend it). I hope everyone is having a lovely Tuesday!